I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
I just tried to pass the bowl to my dog for 2 minutes before I remembered she isn't human. It is 7:27 am.
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
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