I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
so I got guilt tripped into giving her a new years kiss, and she proceeded to try and eat my face while mounting me. when you give a mouse a cookie...
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
Stop recording sex noises and setting them as my ringtones. This time it was at a funeral
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
