I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
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