Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
I feel like vodka or no vodka, you'd still be trying to button your cat into your comforter
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
Randomize
