At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
are you just going to ignore any texts involving my penis from now on? because thats going to shut down a pretty sizeable portion of our conversations.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
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