one two three fourrrrnication!
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
Randomize
