I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
dropping lines from Workaholics has slowly become my icebreaker when hitting on girls. who would have thought "lets get weird" would cause girls to actually get weird
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
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