Swine flu. Run for my life!
i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
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