You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
Randomize
