Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
Standards? I'm sitting on his couch eating microwaved ramen wearing his wife's t-shirt. I don't remember what having standards even feels like.
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
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