We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
Jungle juice turns everything into a pickup line. All I said was "do you play chess" and somehow I got laid.
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
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