If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
I got a call from 999 999 9999. I didn't answer it because I was too busy freaking out about the number.
It was probably Jesus.
I feel like he would have left a message.
It's a pity Stephen Hawking can't do sarcasm.
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
a bus full of elementary school kids may or may not have seen me pissing off my front porch this morning
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
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