that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
I just saw a hot homeless man
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
Thank you for coming with me today. I find it appropriate that we celebrated my negative pregnancy test with slurpees and donuts.
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize
