do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
He? As in you personified your dick?
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
Randomize
