They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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