Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
What part of don't open in front of your kids didn't you understand? Astroglide, magnums, fuzzy handcuffs and a blindfold are going to be hard to explain as friends presents.
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
Randomize
