is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
You carved your initals into all my vitamins and said "now a small part of me will be in you every morning" before you fell asleep with my thong on your head.
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
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