He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
And now, by the power vested in me by the state of intoxication, I now pronounce you fucking awesome.
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
Randomize