yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
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