wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
Randomize
