you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
Do you ever close your eyes when your having sex with your girlfriend and pretend she didn't get fat after high school?
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
It's a good thing my liver is flexible because a lesser man would be dead
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
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