She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
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