p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
Randomize
