this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
Randomize
