If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
Reached a new low last night. Passed out. With my pants down. On the toilet. At ihop. Waitress had to wake me up.
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
Randomize
