we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
wtf are you talking about? You vomit-splattered the cop from the balcony. The cop YOU called because you drunk-dialed 911 because a 5 year old ate the last donut.
it was a krispy kreme
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
Margaritas just taste better when they're bigger than your head
I have found random beers stashed in my purse and microwave... Apparently I thought 2015 was gonna have a beer shortage
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
I’m going to bedazzle that dick
What does that even mean
No idea, but I guarantee he’ll get hard every time he remembers it
Randomize
