I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
Randomize
