physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
Lack of response to this text gains you a half hour of freedom before I initiate operations to conclude you are not, in fact, comatose. You requested no mercy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
Pretty sure that I just proved those labels that say "non-flammable" wrong. totally unrelated, We just made your futon fly with a shitload of fireworks
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
Randomize