I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
Apparently drunk me was getting hit on and i wasn't into it so i shouted "Stupify" at him like i was fucking harry potter then went to the pizza place next to the bar and punted some guys pizza box out of his hands. :(
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Randomize
