I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
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