Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
Dude you literally tried to cook your phone in the microwave. You were so wasted you asked your mom to help you turn it on.
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
Are these your boobs on my camera?
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
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