sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
I just saw a guy getting escorted with handcuffs on, I'm too drunk to be at the airport right now.
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Randomize
