Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
Just saw a man downtown with a cat just riding on his shoulder like a furry parrot. He may be homeless, but I think he's your soul mate.
This Pinterest wedding planning is a good distraction. I'm great at this, my imaginary wedding is beautiful
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
Hey. Did I get punched in the face last night?
Yeah. I told you I would and you didn't believe me.
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