I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
Before I go in, is 'I just got a root canal 2 hours ago' a good excuse to show up drunk to yoga class with a 6 pack? Because if not I think I need to go home.
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
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