either we just had an earthquake or I am really good @ masturbating
It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
Can't decide which I like more. Telling a girl she's pregnant or telling her she has herpes. It's the little things that make medicine tolerable.
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
Randomize
