Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
Randomize
