when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
FYI... At my funeral, it will be your job to throw yourself dramatically onto my casket.
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
if I start to respond to these political texts with a middle finger emoji - do you think they will get the hint?
Randomize
