you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
PS: I just woke up from my shower
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
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