apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
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