The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
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