ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
Randomize
