mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
Randomize
