im drinking this country out of the recession.
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
So I just went to clothing optional bar
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
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