Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
Randomize
