you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
I found a body half wedged into my bedroom wall this morning. How do I explain THIS to the carpenters?
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
THERE IS A MOTHERFUCKING HUMMINGBIRD FLYING AROUND IN OUR HOUSE RIGHT NOW HOW DO I GET IT OUT????
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