I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
Just puked most of my soul out..
Randomize
