I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
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