You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
