But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
Strip clubs it is bday boy. One condition. I am in full custody of your ID. I plan on being in no condition to coordinate rescue operations and we need to keep casualties to a minimum. You cannot be trusted.
Alright goddamnit. Can I bring my pirate hat?
I insist.
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
