Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
I was sat at the table waiting with a glass of wine reading my book and the hotel staff gave me a goldfish in a bowl and said 'heres your date for the night' !
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
It's 11:50 on Friday the 13th. There's a full moon. AND the bride to be just puked on herself while getting a lap dance from a stripper named...wait for it....LUCKY. Is this real life?
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
Just found an airplane bottle of whiskey and I didn't put it in my coffee. I think I deserve a little recognition this morning.
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